| Hnmm |
[Mar. 8th, 2008|04:46 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Home | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  depressed | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Angus and Julia Stone | ] |
I had a bad coupleof days recently, and I can't imagine how Jimmys feeling. He lost his fiancee thursday morning. And it hits us likea ton of bricks. We knew that she had gone into hospital, but not that she had only a week to live, and Jimy was so positive.
She was only 22.
Kinda puts things in perspective for you eh? |
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| Music |
[Feb. 27th, 2008|12:26 pm] |
I was just hinking to myself, what a shame it is that we can't meet the people who make our ears jizz.
Theres a awesome Kinda love you feel for the people who make the music you adore. For example for me it is Newton Faulkner. One of the most inspirational artists to me, his music makes me happy. Like stupidly happy. I'd like to tell bhim mself but i'll never meet him.
Hang on, let me clarify this... Don't mitake me for just a stupid fan. Because I'm a fan of Nelly Furtado, but I couldn't give a shit if she stopped her work. I'm talking about a Passion you feel for the music, a passion which makes you truly beleive in the music. Just like me and Newton Faulkner.
I'd be severly dissapointed and probably depressed if Newton stopped making the music he does.
Anyway, like I was saying, its just a damn shame you can't talk to them yourself. Don't worry i'm not a dimwit, I know you can't because theres about a million other people who want to do the shame. Which kinda makes you think you dont matter. but one thing that you can take comfort in is the fact that you buy his album and your contributing to the success of the artist... :] Just like they deserve.
Sorry if this is a bit vague. But I just wanted to filter.
Anyway, the Newton Faulkner gig last night was amazing. He has kinda restored my faith in humanity, showed me that we aoint all shit heads. :] He sounds just like he does on his album, theres no stupid digital mastering. Which is a massive releif. I'm just happy for him.
And on a flip of the coin, I'm getting very tired of Hip hop. IT ALL SOUNDS THE GOD DAMN SAME!!!!!
It was actually proven that Alternative listeners, (rockers, metalers,Folkers, Indiers(sometimes) and the lark) are more intelligent than those who listen to dance and Hip-hop, because Alternative is much more layered and harder to listen to than dance, because Dance is simple beats with very similer voiceovers.
Obviously, this isn't everyone. Just the majority. ;] Just think of this when a Chav is walking around like he owns the town, listening to rave by himself. Hm.... :D
Plus, ROCK TAKES MORE THAN A GOOD SINGER!!! It takes a good guitarist, a good drummer, and a bond between the band.
None of this synthetic shit.
HOW GREAT ARE POT NOODELS??? :D:D
This concludes our daily broadcast, I hope you all have a fantastic life, and good night. xxx |
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| Reb-Rebs house |
[Feb. 21st, 2008|10:46 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Reba's mudhut | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  calm | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | NONE! | ] |
I'm glad I didn't go to Sarah's party thinger, it sounds a bit toomuch for me, but Happy Birthday to her :]
I had a great night at Debra's on Monday. WE got Pronto played some games.Laughed and Bitched. Muhahaa... All the spoils of a good night in. :D
Also went to newcastle today. Debra spent money on me. ¬_¬ I spent money too! :P Bought a new tribal. Love it.
I'm hoping to find a new job soon, :D. I'm loving my job but the only thingthats bothering me is the hours. I'm going down to my contracted hours. >=[ Nevermind. Hopefully this DearBolt Job will come through and I'll be working 39 hours a weeks, accompanied with a salary of 800 quid a month. Witha garenteed promotion oppurtunity at the end of my contract. :] All the best things to smile about.
I was sat on the train today and actually thought about how people are so bloody miserable, it really sad when peopledont smile back at you. :[ Makes this kitten cry.
I miss being in school sometimes when things were simpler. Probably would have tried harder. </phrasesof>
I've taken an interest in Giger again. Also taken an interest to Graffitti :] I might do a mural somewher just because I'm sick of seing stupid fucking 'tags' Which contain no real talent giving the real Artists a bad name, like Banksy n Invader. *pets them*
Also gotta grafitti bed.:P
Also, Good night.
Don't care for Flames. So dont leave any. If your gonna be mean say nothing at all and be mature. |
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| Reef, Tanks and Pandemonium. |
[Feb. 5th, 2008|10:41 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Hoose. | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  energetic | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Reef - Come back Brighter. | ] |
"One thing that had always disturbed me, is the fact that people have two sets of clothes- a scruffy set for mucking about in and a smart set for going out in. I mean do you change into a different person when you go somewhere 'special'? No! Your still the same bumhole your were building that tree house this morning, so why dress different? Are we all living in the middle ages? Are you all suckers for that sophistication crap they pump out on TV?
Or do you lick the boots of those big men type wankers, with lots of cash? If it one thing I can't stand, it's vanity. Especially in blokes.
I love my clothes." ---Tank girl
I love Tank girl. Although shes made up she has a point. :/
I've been ordering stuff off Amazon something rotten. It like an addiction. Its great. I got the first volume of Tank girl. And its awesome. I also got pandemonium, First Reef album n summat else. I forgt what. But I've made sure I dont have a lot of money in y current account so i dont spend it frivolously. O_O;
Yeah Amazon makes me happy.
Also, Work is going okay. I firgured I was getting trained up for VM. Until I went and told them I was going for another job, I think they'e stopped training me. Unfortunatly. This job probably wont even get back to me for monthes and that depends if they even do!
Oh well, I'll tell them at work that I got a courtesy letter. Saying they wern't what they needed. Maybe they will train me up again... I'd like that. |
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| Puh |
[Nov. 6th, 2007|07:54 pm] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Elephant Gun | ] |
Been in a weird mood recently.
I keep wonderin if I've dropped something beautiful for something less magical.
I've been crying recently. Not sure why. Underlying problems I think. |
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| More Ranting. |
[Oct. 9th, 2007|10:57 pm] |
I've decided to rant about love. :D
I think love used to be something special... But like I've said to Debra. I think we've become to intelligent for love. Our brains get bored. We over anilyse things, we read into thing so much we get paranoid. We also grow to know our partners too much. You know what they are going to do, Going to say when you ask questions.
It sucks really. And is love really that special if you can fall out of it. I feel like my life is much more than falling in love with someone. But because I'm a girl its in most of our nature to be the weaker sex so we need someone to care for us. And we feel good because of it.
Unless your a muscley 6'11" beast woman. Who needs a man now? XD
But, that chemical that makes us attracted to people makes us happy sometimes. It makes feels like we are accepted. And doesn't everyone want to be accepted? I don't think there anyone like "The One for you" because you cannot meet everyone. And... I think real true attraction takes place after a while of knowing someone.
I think people stay with eachother now because they're comfy. Scared to leave they're comfort zones. But in the long run, does this really make us happy?
I suppose it better than being lonely...
Also, people who 'fall in love' over and over tend to be prissy 'pretty' girls. You know why? Sex drives. I think true love is between people who have been disfigured and still are in a relationship.
And Love is such an over used word. You can't use it properly anymore because anyone can tell you they love you. But i think silence is the better tell tale. Because, if you can lay in bed for an hour with eachother. Not sleeping just lying and thinking about eachother. That says more to me than the words. It nice to be loved... but not for the wrong reasons.
I keep saying loved. But I guess I'm gonna keep using it because theres no better word for it.
I'M NEVER GETTING MARRIED.
Right next topic
I hate taking things for granted... like just the other day my dad was in a three car pile up... I could have lost him. But he was okay. Can you imagine if my mum had died when she had that over dose? And what if my dad died in that crash? There is both my parents gone in a blink. I just told them i loved 'em just now.
I'm efinatly not lucky... but nor am I unlucky. Things happen to me which are amazing... but its balanced out by unlucky things happening to me. It sucks. But i guess that karma for you eh?
I'm also sick of hurting people. I hurt gimp... loads. i feel really bad for doing it. But i couldn't stay in a relatioship i was getting sick of... it not fair. He could be with someone who appreciates who he is more than I do.
And I'll never find someone who'll appreciate me like he did, but i can try.
I would never have sex with someone I didn't truly want to be with. Whether I fall out of it eventually or not.
Haha lol Rants over babies!
I feel like its off my chest now. |
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| Hi |
[Oct. 7th, 2007|11:00 pm] |
| [ | Tags | | | ^_^ | ] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Robs! | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  contemplative | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Technology - 50cent ft JT | ] |
Hey, wow its been a long time since I updated this thing...
Well life has completely changed for me. I've split up with gimp... Of whom I miss but dont regret.
I guess i miss it because i was so settled there was definate future in that relationship, there was companionship there was definatly love. You would think thats enough eh?
Yeah for a 25-30 year old. I'm 17. I have a instinctive need to hate everyone who disagrees with me, tlls me what to do. I need to be rebelious. Its a fact of life. I cry sometimes. Because of teenage angsting. It aint going away until... i'm not a teen.
But one thing that really does GRATE on me. Is people talking about MY personal life, when they haven't SPOKE to me for a long fucking time. I'm not being funny, but don't EVER make assumtions about MY life unless I have told you about it or you are the person involved. Keep your god damn opinions to yourself. And not to people who don't even know who I am. Speaking of which, i've changed so much since my last entry that I doubt most the people I used to talk to on here and comment me will know my life anymore.
/rant over
I'm a little all over the place at the moment. As you know. my emotions rule me. ^^; I'm not going to try to be apathetic. I mean its not like I've tried to be. >_>...
Yeah I've been drawing a helluva lot. Some of it is on my deviantART: http://omi-rain101.deviantart.com/
I've been drawin impulsively harldy knwoing what I'm gonna draw as I'm drawing. I really works out for me. Though at the moment I have Artists block. I start something and finish with something I really hate. Grar! It makes Lauren a very unhappy little kitten. >:3
However, I am planning to go to Art college, since I failed most of my A-levels I might as well try to get a qualification in something I'm at least decent in. :D
I've also started my next 48 years of working life :D Hurrah. It well good having money. I have moolah. I just wanna thank every that ever gave me money to do something. I know there was a lot of you. I just wanna make sure you know I REALLY appreciate it.
And those of you who hyave ever given me food from your own fridges.
Haha, I sound like a hobo. Well, I almost kinda was. Just had a home to go to eh? ^_^
Anyway thanks guys. =] a really big warm hig for you.
I'm working at Officers Club now. Its quite good working with Ant. Much better than working with people I completely don't know. Its a good laugh when we have similer shifts. :D I also thank him for getting me the job.
I feel all soppy. Ick.
So yeah, i/m stumbling through life just like I wanted in my earlier entries. I love my life. And everyone in it.
Here to good friends. =] |
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| BLAH!!! |
[Apr. 19th, 2007|07:07 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Pissy land. | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  bitchy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Nothing. | ] |
Bah, i'm bored.
I need Excutment, somehing new, surprises, to feel wanted. Tonot be bored with life.
I
I've settled into a ruteen and I hate it. I've had enough of standing in line and getting up everyday at the same time, gettin back after college nd having nothing to do ubtil andy gets back. I'm tired of being a lazy good for nothing.
I want to do somethng about it, but I need to stay in college.
I used to be spontanious and bouncy.
Gimp gets in and is tired. So he never really wants to do much.Which I can under stand. But I'm frustrated with myself for sitting down when I get in. I HATE it more than anything in the world, a stupid organised day. I want someone to just kiss me out of no where, just because they want to. I want to kiss some on out of no where. Nothing will come from it, but contentment. I wanna hug people and I want them to hug me.
I want to say: Lets do this and have nobody question me but to do it. I've found my friends have settled into a rutine of a day. and yeah, thats what they want to do. But I change that or do something myself it's "we've only got this much time!" "But WE can't!" Then I'll do it myself.
That fucks me right off! I need change. Desperatly.
I don't get how people can thrive to have an organised day. I like stumbling in five minutes late. I like being a twat sometimes. At least I can say I am who I am. When we leave town stupidly early so we can have a 'slow walk up'? Why? What wrong with sitting for a bit longer, what wrong at looking at stuff for a bit longer? Is it really gonna cost you your life? Its costing my life. I'm BORED WITH IT!
Yeah, being late might not look good on my record. But I'm living life fir myself not for some fat busniess man who fucks me over every few monthes with my wages.
I would much rather have a shit fucking job, than conform to everyday life. I'll fucking die first. I never want to have my own baby. Beavuse theres so many other kids out there that need a mother. Being infertile isn't the last thing in the world.
Fuck. you. Fuck. you. Fuck. you! |
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| In a bently |
[Apr. 7th, 2007|10:04 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | ROOOOOM | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  crazy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | My december remix | ] |
Nyah nyah!
Guess who back in the Fother Muckin hizzeh!
...Yeah... home with downies..
XD I'm back y'all. I've been doing a lot since my last post, skating, almost being kicked out of college, laughing at someone breaking their wrist. Ahh... what a life. ^__^
We were drunk at Gimp house warming party. I puked XD Yummy!
ER... I've forgotten the last god knows how long. I miss Blaisy. I've had a brilliant five days of skating, I can land abstracts. Hoorah!
^__^
Gimp and me are still togther. But he's in scottyland at the moment. He's planning on staying longer and its sucks because I wanna skate with him again before he goes to work. But nevermind, if he doesn't wannna skate, then nevermind. ^__^
I'm curently cooing over my new charactor Phox. Shes awesome.
Debra fed me last night! Yay! XD |
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| The happiest I've ever fucking been! :] |
[Dec. 30th, 2006|08:00 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Computer room | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | HAPPY | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Linkin Park-Live in Texas | ] |
Man, I've never been so happy. Life with Gimp is everything I could ask for. Everything before that was fun. But now I'm happy.
I do see him allot. But then again, why not? What wrong with spending most of your time with yourboyfriend if they give you so much feedback? And actually listen to what your saying and like to hear about your day? ITs someone who appriciates you. Someone who'll come meet you because they want to see you, even after a hard days work? Why fucking not?
People are closly getting regarded as annoying, and I've had enough of bullshit from them to last me a life time.
And guys, if you want to see me, ring me. And theres no excuse when you have my mobile number: 07922177485
Stop complaining.
I love him so much.
Anyway, I've been to leicster since last time. It was brillianto! :D Wont go into details because some of you wont be interested. And if your not fuck off.
Debra's been awesome. She really stuck with me and I wanna thank her for all shes done. :)
I got an awesome haul for christmas. My best presents were:
* Xsjardo Skates
* Photoshoot from Gimp
* Laptop
* Fake volumes
* Watch
* all of it
I hope everyone had a great Christmas whether you like me or not. :)
I'm just too happy to care. <3 |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 4th, 2006|10:35 am] |
Hahaha, Ive just been reading over my old entries and I've just realised how emotionally messy I actually was. I was also very Emo and tempermental.
Hehehe, Ah well, life goes round. Ya know , you would think I was a hopeless romantic with Turettes, because It gets pretty heavy and then I just swaer at you. XD Kinda funny.
Life at college is great, i love my lessones And I get on with a few people. :X Still kepping the old ones though, because they've been seived into the best people. Because most of the dickheads have Gone to the Tech. meaning I get to hang out with people I like.
They're having a girlies night out soon,. I'm not sure on going because of what happened with that hannah situation. But they did come to my birthday party, so it can't be that bad.
Life has a funny way of sorting things out i guess. I'm really lucky in the way I've been, its like no matter how bad I think things get, I always end up onthe good side of things.
The last time I cried was when Twiggy dumped me, which is a while ago now. I've been really happy since I've been with Gimp(Andy)
I called them the other day too, Mason and Twiggy. Mason was nice, but Twiggy was just being a cunt. By the end of the phone call I said "I've got somewhere to be soon so I'll hae to go" Twiggy said "Where too? The end of lester penis?" I said rather calmly for the anger I was fucking feeling at that point. "Yeah probably."
I was kinda dying to say: "Yeah, least hes a better fuck than you ever were" But unlike him, I have actually have some regard for other peoples feelings. And because Gimp isn't just a fuck.
I LOVE HIM. End of. :D Sayounara dickfaces! xxx |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 17th, 2006|09:28 am] |
Hehehe, I was looking through a lot of Latin dictionaries, and I've found that my name (lauren) is one of two things: Laurel - A flower Or Riso - To be happy or laugh.
I thought about it and I wanna change my nick name to Riso. But only on the Internet because people have just started calling me Omi and I don't wanna confazzle them.
I'll probably end up making a new charactor out of it. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 16th, 2006|08:15 pm] |
Hehehe, I had a spectaculer Friday. Me and Andy went down to leicster in a complete moment of impulse. Fuckin' ACE! We went to the skate park and the skate shops, let me say, the skate park in leister near where Ginger John lives is ace. So much better than Darlo. By fooking far. We skated that for a bit. I dropped the bigger ramps ^.^ Then went into to town to look at the skate shops. Theres were some skates I wanted for forty quid. Not bad. They say i should get the Xjardo skates because I would suit them..
Anyway! We wentfor a meal on the night and we had a drink. Then we went to Johns house and got rat-arsed. Was brilliant. And then this morning we watched Jimmy Carr. ^__^
Tommorrow, with any luck we're going to South Sheilds for a skate. ^__^
I am so tired. Andy stayed over mine on the thursday night. And we had loads aof fun before deciding i wshould bunk college and go to lesiter. :) I fucking LOVE impulsive boys. Mwah mwah mwah!
I met Joe down there too, what a sweet heart. :P He so nice. (a little bit of a modern day hippy) I was cold yesterday at the pub so he wentand got his huge jacket to keep me warm. ^__^ He made sure I had something to eat. He's like a Big old mum. :D
And John is class! He's random as sin and is a definate good laugh! YAHH!!
So yeah good two days! :P |
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| :') |
[Sep. 7th, 2006|07:25 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | In the bedroom | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  giddy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Two beds and a coffe machine | ] |
I missed doing some homework last night. I should have, but I didn't. But it was worth to hear my babes tell me he loves me. I think I've fallen head first again. But you guy are thinkin: "Oh whatever" And you have every right to. Because you have no idea whats going on up in our head. It would take a lifetime to explain unless you felt it yourself. I know your all gonna say its the rebound its too early. It not for me.
He really loves me. We spend ours just curled up together. We do things together. We talk. Oh man, I love him. You can't possibly choose when you fall head over heels for someone. Mine happened to be sooner than expected. I wish I could express to you how things happened. But I can't. Even me and him can't work it out. Earlier today he went for a drink with his brother. And we just couldn't like... let eachother go. Becaus3 (look at me i r |33t)we kept kissing eachother good bye. Then he had to wlak off... and I went inside, closed the door and then ran out again to kiss him. ARGH! seriously wish I could explain yto you how I fell but I can't. I know what your gonna say. And please don't say it. Because i don't want to hear it. <3 You know how I know? We spent the best part of five hours talking about ourselves and eachother. I loved everything I heard...
Oh my word. I saw my old best friend Scott today. ^^ He's smexy. He likes super Emo but he waved at me like: HIII!!! And I was lilke Hiii!! back! It was brill. And he's in my philosphy class!!!
My lessons are pretty cool. They're not boring like the other ones I uised ot take. I guss it scause I wanted to take them. ^.^ It feels good. |
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| ^.^ |
[Aug. 27th, 2006|01:58 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | In the bedroom | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | content | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Muse: Knight of Cydonia. | ] |
I should be skating today, But Tom decided to be a dickhead and go get himself mpaled on a fence the idiot. Haha, no seriously. He was standing on a wal with his skates on (bright guy huh?) and one of his skates slipped, the spiked fence in front of him slipped into his abdomin tearing the muscles. But thankfully it didn't actually go indide his stomach. I saw it go in and saw him pull himself off. I was nearl fucking sick. Next hing you know he's got a hole in his stomach, white as a sheet, and being carted off to the hospital. We kinda waited for his mom to come by to tell her where Tom had gone. And then we went stanhope park, so Sarah could go get her QE thing over with, then we went shopping a little. XD How cool are we?
Mason broke his skates flipping apparently so I wont be skating with him until he gets new ones. ¬_¬ Silly boy. :D
Andy works allot! Because he's a big working bum!! :D So he's not skating very often. I've decided to add darlington Skaters on MySpace. see if i can go down there with them.
Sarah just doesn't skate. roflol.
I'll go down anyway, by myself. :D
I'm babysitting later, hopefully Andy will come with me to keep me company. But then again babysitting is really boring so I doubt he would wanna come XD I've been babysitting allot lately but I'm not complaing. It money isn't it? :D Besides... ;] Alone time.
Did anyone watch Muse last night at reading!? Omg Wow! They fucking brilliant they played about 8 songs. And they completely stole the show. In my opinion anyway. Arctc monkeys were brilliant as well, I wish I had got tickets. :D
Anyway. Tomorrow, Andy's treating me to a meal somewhere. gotta find some nice places today. Hehe, I'mma gonna get nicely dressed and everything. It'll be my first dinner date. ^^. He asked me to sleep over his as well. Not sure if I should but I want to. ;] It not for anyone else to decide really. So. ^__^
Gonna be a good night tomorrow if all goes well. Which it should.
I'm hoping I can ginf something nice and girly for me to wear. But I havn't got a lot, which means the tenner I get from babysittting tonight will go on some new jeans. and a top. :D Unless I wear my dress. ...But even then, thats like my prom dress. But it can be wore with jeans. And look nice. So I'm not sure. Help? :P
Oh, my groups on myspace is:
www.groups.myspace.com/inlineisnotacrime
Go lookie!
Omi xxxx |
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| Look who's alone now. It not me. :P |
[Aug. 23rd, 2006|12:23 pm] |
Hehe, things are going good for me right now. I've gotta say though...
KINGDOM HEARTS IS TAKING THE FUCKING PISS. I MEAN HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE A SHIPMENT TO GET FROM AMERICA TO ENGLAND!??!
Ah.... ^_^
I don't think about twiggy anymore. He's not really more than a good friend. I miss him, but I'm not loosing any sleep over it. If he was really that good a friend and cared for me that much, he might have come see me. But he hasn't. So who needs him? :) i'll still talk to him, because he's still my friend. No matter what.
I feel kind of... whole. At the moment. I can't really explain it. I'm not in need of anything I am where i want to be, I am who I want to be. And I'm starting to think out my future. I've jsut had a bit of a thought about things and the way I think on life.
This will last all of a day, until I get my GCSE results tomorrow. I'll let you know about it. :)
I'm not to confident in how I've done. but with any luck I should at least be able to take two lessons. Which is all I really need, I mean its better than taking 1 at the tech right? :P no offence to you guys though, you get some awesome people from the tech. ;]
I've been skating a lot lately, I'm hoping I can go somewhere like sompetitions and stuff eventually, when I get really good. Which I know I will because I want it enough.
I think if I had this atitude in my GCSE's I might not have been so nervous about it XD.
*h*a*p*p*y* :) :) |
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| :D |
[Aug. 12th, 2006|04:59 pm] |
I'm over him! Nyahaha. Indeffinatly. I'll probably end up liking him again, but for now I havn't thought about him. :D
I feel good. I had a good ol' skate today and I'm aboutto go meet mum in Town xxx
Then I'm going to Sarah's aunties bbq!
Woot! |
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| HAHAHAH! |
[Aug. 9th, 2006|11:04 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Bedroom!!! | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | crazy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | The Feeling - Never be Lonely | ] |
Hello! Guess what? Twiggy split up with me. Yep. Even after all i said, he split up with me. Yes, I am heartbroken, and yes I wont get over it for a long time. But I've spilled my tears and now its time to get on with things.
But wait! Whats this? He wanted a threesome with the Stacey and Duffy1!?!?! Oh my gosh!!!! It broke me again. But If he's that fucking desperate for a loose fuck, then leave him to it. He can fuck as many people as he wants. And get the STD's to go with it. I really don't give a damn at this moment in time. I didn't think he would be the type to do that though. I would expect Duffy too. But not Twiggy.
Oh well. Lifes a bitch, And then you nearly fuck one. ;) Am I right?
I guess I'm in a scathing mood. And I really hope this cuts as deep as it cut me. :)
The only people who make me forget about him is Sarah and Andy and Reba. They all give me a place away from the shit. ^__^
Reba helped me out when I was upset the day Twiggy dumped me. Sarah makes me feel better by making me laugh and stciking up for me. And Andy just generally does it. XD!!! We have some weird conversations.
I really want to go up RedHall. But I know if I go up now thinga will be uneasy. But thats not whats stopping me. Its the money ad the hurt I'll go through just to be there. i still love him as much as I did.
I don't WHY so please don't ask I have no answer for you.
HAHAHA Shane told me to go oout in odd shoes. And guess what? I did it. But I forgot to take the other shoes with me. So I had to walk back today by myself with odd shoes. Man I got some funny look, but I loved it. Despite Everything thas been going on I'm in a quite happy mood.
The other day I went to Andy's bbq it was great! We went into the front room and...
played on guitar Heros!! XD It was great. But obviously its nothing like actually playing guiter. But it was good. :D
Tjhe day after, me Andy and Tom went to the Redcar Skate park. It was great! XD WE skated for a while and then we went on the beach. Where Andy wore... A GOOLD SPECKLED THONG! OMG! I have never laughed so hard in my life. I just turned around and there he was in a tiny gold thong running down the beach and jumping into the water. I will never look at him in the same way again. WE then proseeded to bury Tom in the sand and make him look like a ery discombobulated woman.
Was very funny.
Then, we went to the Arcades. XD!!! Andy beat me at the dancemat. And I beat him at bowling. So I've deducted that I'm the butch and he's the Bitch. XD! (seme uke ;))
Yesterday I bought some pink beads and a necklace. :D I loved it. ^^ They're cute as fuck!!
Not very punk though. ;)
Peace I'm signing off! :P |
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| WARNING: DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE GONNA BE A DICK. |
[Jul. 6th, 2006|10:06 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | comp | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  anxious | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Gunning Down Romance | ] |
I was listening to Gunning Down Romance by Savage Garden. Its so true. Heres the lyrics for those who don't know it.
Love and other moments are just chemical reactions in your brain
In your brain
And feelings of aggression are the absence of the love drug in your veins
In your veins
Love come quickly
'Cause I feel my self-esteem is caving in
It's on the brink
Love come quickly
'Cause I don't think I can keep this monster in
It's in my skin
Love and other socially acceptable emotions are morphine
They're morphine
Cleverly concealing primal urges often felt but rarely seen
Rarely seen
Love I beg you
Lift me up into that privileged point of view
The world of two
Love don't leave me
'Cause I console myself that Hallmark cards are true
I really do
I'm gunning down romance
It never did a thing for me
But heartache and misery
Ain't nothing but a tragedy
I'm gunning down romance
It never did a thing for me
But heartache and misery
Ain't nothing but a tragedy
Love don't leave me
Take these broken wings
I'm gonna take these broken wings
And learn to fly
And learn to fly away
And learn to fly away
And learn to fly away
I'm gunning down romance
Take these broken wings
I'm going to take these broken wings
And learn to fly
And learn to fly away
And learn to fly away
And learn to fly away
I'm gunning down romance
I'm gunning down romance
I'm gunning down romance
I'm gunning down romance
----------------+__________________________________+--------------------
I kind of thought to myself earlier, how can you possibly be friends with someone you have done everything with? How can you sit there, after a relationship perhaps, and watch as another person taste what you had. How can you be friends with someone who used to value you as something more than a friend, but does not now.
I don't think I could. ...I know Twiggy and I are going to end one day... I'm just dreading it so much. I don't want to fall out with him I don't want to cause trouble with him. If he wants to stay in sometimes I'll stay in with him... But I just want to go out sometimes with just me and him. I know thats not whats happening now, but It will... I hope.
At the moment I don't think I could stand being away from him for too long. I know that sounds like I'm a possessive pain, maybe i am, I don't care because its true. I don't think he understands how much I like him. But thats okay.
Previous relationships have set things in my mind, and I sometimes resort back to them, hiding away my secrets and reading into things too much... But I can't help it.
I think I've finally found somewhere I like. I can't wait to see him, I guess. I get sick of staying in sometimes. But to be honest i don't mind where we are as long as I'm with him. At this point your thinking: Whatever Lauren, you emotional sack of shit.
I don't mind. If you don't like it, fuck off. Like I always say.
I don't think He'll read this. At least I hope not. I don't want him to think I'm obsessive. Because I'm not... I just never wanna waste time, you know? Ya never really know whats gonna happen to you. And I guess I would really regret it if something happened to one of us, and we wasted our time.
I walk through town sometimes, and I see all the couples spending time together. At those points I really wish that Twiggy was there. He doesn't have to hold my hand. Or do anything. I just want to know he's there. I know he is... but... it would be nice... you know?
This entry is very angsty. As you have read :)
Brighter news is that me and Andy are getting on ^__^ He's really cool, he's outgoing, funny and he skates! What better friend do you want? Muhahaha. Well apart from Sarah and Mason and Twiggy and Debra because NOBODY can compare to those guys.
I had a dream last night. Everybody died. Except me. Duh. (Deb: Imagine CW style. :'(). There was wood everywhere sticking high out of the ground. Leaving big shadows over bodies. I looked closly and I saw everyone I knew. First person I came to was Sarah.
She had cuts all over her, little tiny ones that you couldn't see until you looked closely. Then it was mum, dad, nan, and Auntie Karen.... I don't wanna talk about them.
But Mason was beheaded and Twiggy was burnt. By the end of it all, someone told me I did it. That I killed them all.
I fucking hated that dream. It kinda put me in a funny mood all day. |
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| ARHH! |
[Jul. 1st, 2006|10:32 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | In dads roooom | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  LOL! | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | 96 quite bitter beings - cKy | ] |
God sake! I am sick of hearing about the football. So fucking what if England lost. Life goes on. Get the fuck over it! I mean yeah people are dissapointed. But to be honest its all down to luck, especially in the shoot outs. You can't win everything because England isn't the best team in the world. Expect to get beaten some times.
Yeah people have their hearts set on England winning. But thats there fault for putting too much faith into a football team. And yeah I get people follow it. But don't whine and bitch to me about it when they lose and I think its halairious... It pisses me off something chronic.
------No flaming please. I'll only get pissy. ------
Anyway, I love my boyfriend. :D Today, we just messed about. He enjoys my company as much as I enjoy his, (not in the sexual way. For all you dirty bastards out there ;]) He even took me home today, which he doesn't normally do. not because hedoesn't want to. He's just tired sometimes. And even when he did the football shift today at his work he still came with me on the bus. I kinda regret being so weird about him not being near me on days. I just gotta be more understanding I guess. I mean he works. I don't. But thats not an excuse to constantly be inside. ;]
Kkekeke me and Andy (leister ghuy) Are gettin' to be awesome friends. We like to talk about naked people and so on. :D He's real funny and he even tried the dance mat... and beat SARAH O__O
Hahha me and sarah were supoposed to do a BBQ today. ...Uh... Failed? XD
bye bye my little bumpkins!
...Yes I have been playing TOS. Yes Zelos kicks ass. Yes I'm gettin' new skates :P |
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airefox's journal